Stupid Easy Recipe

 I promised you recipes, didn't I? I tried this one yesterday, along with 2 others which will not see the light of day. One was downright awful and the other just so so and since it required an expensive cut of beef, see ya! But this one, as an old friend used to say, is "Stupid Easy." You have to say this with the most extreme of southern accents and repeat it several times in the sentence, as in: "I made this pie? With canned milk? And it was stupid easy, I tell you. You just opened a can. I mean it - stupid easy!" Are you reading this with a southern accent? If not, try again. You must say pie like this: Peye. Think The Help. This friend was not a great cook and lots of her stuff which was "Stupid Easy" was also "Really Gross" but I love the expression and it's outlasted her friendship. 

 All you food snobs, you can stop reading now. This recipe requires some really processed ingredients like Cool Whip. YUM.  I know, I know - I usually eat "clean," as the weight lifters say, but I also have a balanced approach to eating/ cooking and need to bust out once in a while. Plus this was kind of fun to make and fun is good, don't you think? So is this peye. 

Stupid Easy Caramel Pie

1 (14-ounce) can fat-free sweetened condensed milk
1 (6-ounce) package reduced fat graham cracker crust
1 (8-ounce) container frozen reduced-calorie whipped topping, thawed
1 (1.4-ounce) Skor or Heath bar, coarsely chopped

Equipment: 2 cup glass measure, 3-4 quart slow cooker

1) Pour milk into 2-cup glass measure, cover with foil. Place in a 3-4 quart slow cooker. Add very hot water to slow cooker to reach level of milk in measure. Cover slow cooker with lid; cook on low heat setting 9 hours (milk should be the color of caramel). 

2) Pour caramelized milk into crust; let cool.  Spread whipped topping over pie, and sprinkle with chopped candy. Yield: 8 servings 

Per serving: CAL 327, PRO 5.6g, FAT 8.8g, CARB 53.9g, FIB 0.1g. 

It's Just A Number

Yesterday, Weight Watchers told me I was too fat to work for them. This hurt my feelings a little, then I got kinda mad.  Since reaching my goal of losing 90 pounds, I had entertained the idea of working for WW as a leader for a while. It's how I lost my weight, I believe in the program, and I thought I'd be good at it. My favorite thing in the world is a room full of people who can't leave until I stop talking.  I knew there was a problem though: I weigh 15 pounds more than the top of the range they have for women my height.  
 They're having a job fair this weekend, so I filled out the online application and sent an email to the lady in charge. I explained my situation, that although I was over the desired weight, I was extremely fit. I went on to say that, while I could lose 5-6 pounds, I couldn't get to weight required or if I did, could not maintain it. I'm a big person. I'm a 12. And I'm wicked muscle-y. But I could get a doctor's note because my doctor and I picked this weight as a healthy one for me. 
 The woman called back with a few questions and was very nice but told me that I'd have to get to lose 15 pounds in order to lead a group. End of story. This hit me harder than I would have thought: for one thing, I was in Walmart, which makes me feel sad that I'm there anyway. But for a brief moment, I went to the Bad Place and heard: You're still too fat.  And this made me a little weepy. I got over that quickly because you know what? I'm not fat. At all. But when you've been fighting your weight pretty much your entire life and you lose 90 pounds and are very healthy,  you don't want to hear that you're still too fat, especially from someone who has never met you and is making a decision based on a number. 
Because that's all it is: just a number on a scale. It doesn't define who I am. And while it looks like it's going to prohibit this opportunity, it's way too arbitrary a thing to make a decision about someone. 
So you lose, Weight Watchers. Pun intended. 
Big picture? It's never easy when the universe tells you no.  Since I am a person of Faith, I believe that God has a different plan for me and it will be much better than the one I chose for myself. But I'm one of God's most difficult children and I always think he needs my input. Being a WW leader seems like such a good fit: I've been successful on the program, I love to help and inspire people, and I'd be wicked funny as a leader. 
So I'll try and be patient and be receptive for the next opportunity. I love my part time job and plan to keep on working there but I do feel a desire to be out in front of people, hopefully being funny but also being inspirational. I don't mean this to sound like I think I'm all that and a bag of (low fat) chips, as a friend used to say. I'm all about taking those first important steps to health. If I can't do that as a WW leader, there's another plan in place. I just don't know what it is yet. 
Today I'll celebrate feeling fit and healthy and rockin' another cute outfit. And I'll find joy in knowing I'm not in charge of the Big Plan but am an active participant in the Next Big Adventure. 

The Journey to A Healthier Me and Cuter Clothes

The Freedom Center, where I work out,  asked to feature me on their new Success Board. I'd have to submit a before and after picture and a testimonial. I agreed because I really do think If I can do it, anyone can. I thought I'd share the story of my journey. 

I never set out to lose 92 pounds. Who thinks they have 90 pounds to lose? But the summer after I turned 50, I had a hard time making the case for staying fat. I felt good? No. I looked hot? Nope. I had really cute clothes? Kinda, but they were really, really big cute clothes. And my knees were killing me! At the same time, a friend had mentioned that a number of women our age were having heart attacks and strokes. I decided to make a change for a healthier lifestyle and a healthier me. And I wanted to look better in the photos of my daughter’s high school graduation the following June.

That fall, my pals were starting the Attack the Fat program at the Freedom Center in my town. In the program, you work out with a trainer three times a week for an hour in a group of 3 – 6. You are encouraged to eat healthily and work out on your own a few days as well. I debated whether or not to join them but had a conflict with work.  In the end, I opted to not to join but vowed to start on the same day they did. I started Weight Watchers on my own and walked every other day, come hell or high water. When my friends completed the program, I joined one of the Ongoing Personal Training groups. At the first session I told the trainer, I don’t run. She disagreed. I ran – a little and very slowly.

By the time I joined the Attack the Fat program in spring of ’11, I had lost 45 pounds. In those 8 weeks, I lost another 20 pounds and a whopping 37 inches. I was hooked. I started taking classes and kept up with the Ongoing Personal Training sessions. By this point, my knees no longer hurt. I had stopped taking heartburn medicine. And I could run! Still slowly though….

The biggest transformation I made was with my relationship with food. I read Food, God and Love by Geneen Roth (which I highly recommend). My AHA! moment was when we were going through a particularly stressful time with my daughter’s college search. I was sitting at the kitchen table and thought; I just want to eat chocolate until the stress goes away.  My next thought was, Sure, you can eat chocolate, but what about the situation will change if you eat it? And I realized nothing would change. I’d feel good for a second, bad the next morning and the situation would be exactly the same. That was big for me.

My journey of eating healthily and exercising continued on. Almost 2 years after I started, I reached my goal of losing 90 pounds. Technically, I could lose more but really, I’m happy in my size 12s and never set out to be skinny. I now use my love of cooking for Good instead of Evil and can’t imagine going back to my former sedentary lifestyle. I did have to buy a whole new wardrobe but it’s been worth every penny! Cute clothes rule! It’s been an incredible journey. I feel like myself again. Only with better knees.